Category: cooking

Recent amusements »

The scene: Hannaford. Also known as “Hannafuhhd.” Or “the grocery store.” The players: A woman, 40s-ish; her teenage son; an Unrelated Observer. All are in line (also known as “on line”) at the checkout. Son: Hey, we forgot something. Be right back. [Son dashes away and returns moments later with a box of granulated sugar.] [...]

How to make szarlotka »

Step 1. Fly to New York City. After dropping your bags in Cobble Hill, take the train to Williamsburg and get off at Bedford Avenue. Meander north to Greenpoint, making your way past the lofty glass condos that replaced your old block, through the once-weedy park that is now home to cultivated trees and popular [...]

File under: Things that are funny inside, but not necessarily outside, my head »

Walking home from the bank just now I stopped at the market to buy some kale, because I am a greens-eating elitist who is out of touch with real America. The cashier didn’t offer a bag for my lone item, because this market caters exclusively to bleeding-heart liberals who hug trees literally all day long, [...]

Recipe: tragic suffering congee »

You will need: A large pot Some measuring cups Water or chicken stock, water is probably the traditional way to go but if you’re really suffering, use chicken stock Some rice Something to stir with A considerate helper Instructions: Pour about 8 cups of water/stock into the pot. Realize you don’t have any regular white [...]